Saturday, September 29, 2007

Running Class (Week Three): In Which Chelsa Gets Hit In The Face By A Duck


Yes, I said a duck.
Twice a week, the whole running class meets, with coaches and assistant coaches and people to say encouraging things to us, and we run in a park in West Davis. We are also expected to do a run on our own at some point during the week, following the exercise plan but choosing our own time and place. Many of the women choose to run together anyway, including myself, and we meet downtown on Saturday mornings. Today we decided to run in the arboretum, which seemed lovely and shady and scenic and therefore a good place to commence movement. However, the loveliness is largely due to small water pools scattered here and there throughout the arboretum, which look nice but smell bad. The shade is largely due to oak trees, which do provide shade but also scatter treacherous slippery acorns everywhere. Two women sustained embarrassing acorn-related injuries. I did not slip on an acorn, and I was just beginning to bask in my uncharacteristic grace when the duck thing happened. Our large-ish group passed by a gang of ducks (can you say a gaggle of ducks, or is that just for geese?)about halfway through the run, and apparently the sight of so many women in sneakers frightened them. They all flew indignantly into the air, and I was not quick enough dodging to the side (you see how I could have made a pun about ducking my head, and I didn't? You're welcome) and the duck totally winged me in the face as it flew past. And then it quacked angrily at me over its shoulder. (Ducks do too have shoulders, and no one likes a nit-picker.) I was very prepared for stiff muscles, sore joints, shin splints, and general tiredness when I started running, but I did not think to arm myself against ducks to the face. I am still enjoying the class tremendously, but if we ever go to the arboretum again, I will be purchasing a giant hamster ball to run in, for protection. Prudence dictates it, I think.

3 comments:

Margaret said...

While I realize that it is impolite to laugh at others' misfortunes, that is HILARIOUS (and totally something that would happen to me, too.) And, the fowl at the Arboreteum are mean. When Jean and I were little, we went there to feed the ducks. We ran out of bread and were descended upon by an angry mob of geese and ducks. Very scarring.

granny said...

You could just be harboring resentment toward all winged creatures after the gull incident when you were 2. Did the duck really "bump" into you? Or were you chasing it in a threatening manner?

Anonymous said...

As a large fan of corny puns i am a bit disappointed to miss out on this one. The good news is that with your new found prowess as a runner, you should have no problem out distancing the ganster related relatives of the offended darkwing duck. Either that or you could just wear a helmut.

Dad