Dear Little Old Ladies At The Grocery Store:
Yes, I am wonderfully, amazingly, delightfully soft, pink, sweet-smelling, and jolly. I appreciate your noticing and acknowledging my cuteness. However, when you say things like, "Look at those cheeks! I just want to eat them up!", like five separate little old ladies did at the store yesterday, it causes me to feel alarmed. I like my cheeks, too. They are downright adorable, especially when I smile. But please, don't eat them. It is statements like this that cause babies to suffer from stranger anxiety. Thank you for your prompt attention to this matter.