I mentioned yesterday how much Max is eating. Both quantity and variety have increased, and this has led, logically but grossly, to an increase in the quantity and variety at the other end of the digestive cycle. Fine. Whatever. I taught preschool, I'm pretty tough, I can handle a little poo. Except that the last two nights in a row -- TWO NIGHTS IN A ROW, mind you -- Max has somehow managed to poo not only well in excess of his daily quota, but out the side of his diaper and onto whatever is unfortunate enough to be underneath him. Last night, he was in his high chair when the bomb dropped, and the entire seat of the high chair was disgusting, as was the entire seat of Max. Ian cleaned the chair, I cleaned the Max, and I honestly cannot say which of us got the short end of the stick. Tonight, I was caught unawares by how serious a diaper-change I was undertaking until it was way too late. Mother and child were both covered in unspeakable filth, and then, to add insult to injury, Max peed on me while I was trying to piece our shattered lives back together. I chucked him immediately into the bath, where he peed again, and then attempted escape. No shame, folks. No shame at all.
Friday, October 27, 2006
Sideswiped
I mentioned yesterday how much Max is eating. Both quantity and variety have increased, and this has led, logically but grossly, to an increase in the quantity and variety at the other end of the digestive cycle. Fine. Whatever. I taught preschool, I'm pretty tough, I can handle a little poo. Except that the last two nights in a row -- TWO NIGHTS IN A ROW, mind you -- Max has somehow managed to poo not only well in excess of his daily quota, but out the side of his diaper and onto whatever is unfortunate enough to be underneath him. Last night, he was in his high chair when the bomb dropped, and the entire seat of the high chair was disgusting, as was the entire seat of Max. Ian cleaned the chair, I cleaned the Max, and I honestly cannot say which of us got the short end of the stick. Tonight, I was caught unawares by how serious a diaper-change I was undertaking until it was way too late. Mother and child were both covered in unspeakable filth, and then, to add insult to injury, Max peed on me while I was trying to piece our shattered lives back together. I chucked him immediately into the bath, where he peed again, and then attempted escape. No shame, folks. No shame at all.
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5 comments:
This awesome post was written by Chelsa, not Ian, even though it says that it's by Ian.
Everything Max does...he does with poofection.
It's probably really easy to make jokes about the poo when you never had to touch it or smell it.
Chels...you should write a book. I would buy it, and recommend it as the laugh out loud, tears in the eyes, hilarious world of Max and me.
He's a monster. A MONSTER!
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