Max to Mama (at the grocery store): I need all of that cookie.Mama: No, I got it for you and Maggie to share. Maggie gets this piece, and you get this piece.
Max (loudly): NO I WANT THE WHOLE COOKIE!! I WANT MAGGIE'S COOKIE AND I DON'T WANT MAGGIE TO HAVE ANY COOKIE! MAGGIE IS NOT MY FRIEND SHE IS JUST A BABY! BABIES ARE BAD! NO BABIES! NEVER! ... (and etc.)
Mama: Listen. I'm going to hang onto the cookie until you calm down and are ready to talk in a nice voice. You don't get things by yelling at people. (and etc.)
[brief pause while Max sniffles and Mama lurks in an out of the way corner of the store to minimize disruption and Maggie happily eats her shard of cookie]
Mama: It seems like you've calmed down a little bit now. Are you ready to try again?
Max (somewhat resentfully): Yes.
Mama: Would you like to have your cookie now while we finish shopping?
Max (somewhat resentfully): Yes. But I wanted the whole cookie. I really did.
Mama: Yes, I think you made that pretty clear.
Elderly Lady Passing By: Ohhh, you've got a cookie, haven't you? Is that a good cookie?
Max: Yes. You know, Mama took my cookie away from me. I cried.
Elderly Lady Who Now Regrets Trying To Make Conversation: Oh? Well ...that's ... that's too bad?
[Elderly Lady scurries off]
Max: I was pretty sad about that cookie.
Mama: I know, Max.
Max: I wish I had Maggie's cookie, too.
Mama: Oh, well, Max.
Max: Thatwise I cried.
Mama: Live in the now, Dude.
2 comments:
We moms sure know how to torture our sons who love to eat cookies. Mason is quite opinionated on such topics as well. Just wait until the baby sister has teeth. Oh the trouble we shall have.
Just think, Jen ... soon you'll have twice the opportunity to torture your offspring! And! And also I've found that you can set them up to torture each other! With almost no effort! Good times.
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