Birth:Nature's Grossest Miracle

So Chelsa and I are taking a birthing class. Here are some of the things we have learned there:

1.Birth is cool, yet gross.

2.As gross as birth can be, "afterbirth" is grosser...with no cool new baby to look forward too, on account of you already got your baby during the real, placenta free birth.

3.Babies come out grey/off white...then turn yellow upon occasion.

Our birthing class is exactly the touchy-feeling kind of experience one would expect of our fair city. The class starts with a group discusion. The instructor askes a question "Has anyone had any weird dreams?". It never ceases to amaze me that in class with twenty two people (none of whom know one another) one person will share something personal and disturbing. Girl in class says:
"Sure, Ive had tons of dreams...weird dreams...strange sexual dreams with many partners..."ect.

Our instructor says this is totally normal. So far everything everyone has said has been totaly normal. Perhaps I will make up some stuff to find out if it is totally normal. Then again, it is very unlikely Chelsa will let me.

Despite some slow moments, I have learned some cool stuff.

1.Some drugs are bad, some are not so bad.

2.In the unlikely event that I am called upon to deliver my own child, I am to refer to page 14 in the "Your Pregnancy" packet, section 4.

3.Men have it so, so easy...ya we die sooner...but wow...we just don't have to do anything.

Max kicks during the whole class. Like his old man, he is driven to distraction when presented with the tedium of paying attention to others. I can really see us getting along.